I am a very happy person, don't get me wrong, but there are a few things I would like to change.
The problem is, it is hard for me to get motivated.
I feel like there are so many other places where I am giving my attention: my job, my life, school..
I just don't feel like there is much more Jessica to give.
I know they say that if you want something bad enough, you will work for it. This is a belief I have as well.
But sometimes, change takes a back burner to just existing. It takes enough energy and concentration to stay above water, figuratively speaking.
That isn't to say I haven't tried. I have successfully made changes. I have made out plans to change. I have read books.
But when it comes down to it, I haven't been successful. Because the changes I wanted to make? I am still struggling.
Every time that I feel like I fail, it just makes getting motivated that much harder.
And I know things won't get better, but it depresses me thinking about it, rather than motivating me.
I am so different from my darling boyfriend, who, when he wants change, he goes out and makes it happen.
He cuts to the chase. He understands no one can do these things for him.
When he wants his life to change, he does it.
That is one of the things I respect most about him. I always hold off, testing the waters. He goes for it.
I wish I could be like him sometimes.
Where can I find motivation?
